Air North, Yukon’s Airline Awarded First UFO Contract
Whitehorse, Yukon – April 1, 2024 – Air North, Yukon’s Airline proudly announced today that it has secured NATO’s elusive UFO contract.
For the first time since the contract has been awarded—coincidentally the first time the contract’s very existence has been made public—it has gone to a carrier based in Canada.
“I can’t get into specifics, but I can say that we’re responsible for some new lights in the sky,” winked Joe Sparling, Air North’s President and CEO. “But blink and you might miss it!”
Sparling revealed that the airline had collaborated with a local UFO specialist to develop a custom craft, the Pika Mark One. Asked about the peculiar name, Sparling noted: “It’s nimble and disappears quicker than one of our warm cookies. Plus it makes this little squeak when you rev up the engines.”
While the contract’s details are as secret as Area 51, one thing’s for sure: Pika Mark One, registered as Pika B-OO, sports an unmistakable Yukon orange tail. “If it’s flying in our fleet, it’s flying Yukon,” Sparling declared.
Asked about potential close encounters of the third kind, Sparling replied: “Flying saucers are real, and they’ll be ours. But if we spot any alien visitors, our strategy is simple: hit the gas and hope they’re just here to see the log skyscrapers or the signpost forest.”
Air North is contracted for a five-year mission, and hopes to secure NORAD’s North Pole Distribution Agreement next. “Fingers crossed,” said Sparling, already sporting a Santa beard and hat. “I’ve even got the milk and cookies ready, just in case.”